"Go Away"

I read this blog post and it struck me hard and makes me brace for the near future.
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/robyn-passante-/i-hate-you-stay-right-here_b_5671134.html?ncid=fcbklnkushpmg00000037

J is at the "go away" stage.  It hurts.  It's amazing how much it hurts.  He gets a hateful look in his eye and says, "go away mommy!"  We have taught him that it hurts our feelings (does that empower him?).  We have also demonstrated that we'll go away and he'll be left alone.  At the end of that post, the 6 year old told his mom to go away while clinging to her leg...he didn't want to talk, but he wanted her to stay.  I think J would love it if I didn't make him confess his unwise choices or say he was sorry...or talk at all, though he's quite the chatter box on his own.  He doesn't just say go away during discipline, he wields the new found "power" at all different times.  My baby is growing up and becoming independent.  I know I'm suppose to see the good it in, but like the mom who wrote the blog post, I see the baby who I gave everything to, pulling from me while clinging for dear life. May I learn to let go...slowly!


This post from Momastery summed up what I felt when I slammed J's fingers in the door.  I saw all the pain in his future (physical pain, bullies, etc.) and wanted to protect him.  I'm glad I'm learning the lessen now.  I can do my best to protect him now, but at some point I have to slowly release him and let him learn on his own, but also stand with him and let him know that I'm there.  Ultimately, Jesus is guiding us both, so keeping our eyes on him and his purpose for our lives keeps us on the right track.